1 month ago yesterday, we met Will.
I could go on and on about how our lives have changed, how we are all of a sudden those people seeking out changing tables in Chipotle’s bathroom and freaking out over bad drivers on the road. I could passive-agressive joke-brag about my kid’s milestones. I could do a whole rundown of his stats, nicknames and developing personality.
But mostly I just want to write about how much I love the way his lips form a perfect little rosebud when he’s sleeping on my chest. How much I love his little sighs of contentment whenever he’s in someone’s arms-which is pretty much all day long.
I want to remember how fragile he seemed just 4 weeks ago and how big he seems to me now. How sturdy and strong he seems already as he sits in my lap holding up his own head and looking up so alertly into my eyes. How Chris found a tiny t-shirt in a drawer yesterday that he’s already grown out of.
I want to remember how we swaddled him, sleeping sweetly, for most of those first days home. Now he’s like a Houdini breaking out of his swaddles in his sleep with his chunky, strong legs. He used to be content to just lay in anyone’s lap, now he likes to squirm all over, attempting to crawl over our shoulders, head held more steadily everyday. He’s happiest with new scenes, new sounds, new views.
I want to remember the way he protests when I sit him up to burp mid-feed and how he then sort of sighs resignedly and slumps over my hand, staring at his pigeon toes as we try to break up the gas bubbles together. I want to remember his early manic-python approach to breast-feeding and the way he waves his arms around when he’s really hungry.
I want to remember how deliciously kissable his chubby cheeks are as he rests them on my shoulder and how amazing it smells to bury my nose in his downy soft hair. How he’s started to grab onto my shirt, my hair, my hands, as he takes naps in my arms.
I want to remember the look of wonder in his eyes as he looks up at Chris, totally mesmerized by his Daddy. I want to remember the nights when Chris sits awake with Will sleeping in his lap, just because he doesn’t want to put him down quite yet. I can’t wait until Will can understand his Dad’s hilarious commentary as he reads Harry Potter out loud to him.
Yesterday we took him for a road trip to Milwaukee to see his Aunt Devin and Lake Michigan. We marveled at his ability to stay awake most of the day and offer tentative smiles and coos all around. The way he ate like a champ in the back of the car, in a restaurant bathroom, in a lake-side park and took a grassy-knoll diaper change in stride (By the way, this product is probably the best 10 bucks we’ve ever spent).
On the car ride home, as the sunset all golden over the fields along the highway, Chris and I looked at each other and let out tired, contented sighs and gave each other bittersweet smiles. “Can you believe he’s already a month old?” we asked each other?
Nope we can’t.
And before this post gets too sappy, I’ll sign off and leave the interwebs with this gem: what two parents and a one month old baby look like before they start smiling for the camera appropriately. If I recall, he may have been in the process of ruining his diaper. Thanks Auntie Devin for the photos!